Losing Broadband

A lot of people have been asking “how did you lose your broadband?”.   Once I explain it they are shocked to realise how easily it could happen to them.  So here is the story and a few things you aught to know if you’re attached to your broadband or hoping to get it….

The Story:
Martian was moving office.  The last filing cabinet was going into the back of the truck.  It’s 8.00pm and all is well.  Cue the the Telecom Rep…. I receive a call to confirm that the technician will be around the next day to hook up all the business lines and our service will be transferred across – we just won’t have any broadband….

What?  No broadband?  I explain how it is vital that we have broadband and that there is broadband at the new location so why would it not be there once the services are moved.  The rep explains that the port at the new office will be given to someone else, as will the one at the current office, and that I might get a port in November 2011 when they have finished their upgrades.  Deaf to my plees she tells me there is not other option and hangs up.

Stunned I take the load to the office.  I call the Telecom helpline and after navigating through the annoying automated system which, by the way, does not have an option like “if our idiotic policies are going to put you out of business and you would like to sell your sole to the devil to get your broadband back on, please press 666″, I eventually get hold of a guy.  I explain the situation and he tells me that the only way I’ll get internet at that location is if I can organise for the current tennants to leave their Telstra broadband accout there for me to take over.  Now, it’s 8.30 on a Thursday and this Telstra account is due for termination and reloction the next day.

I manage to talk to the current occupants and give them the run down.  They agree to cancel the “move order” on their account and get in touch with Telstra.  The Telstra rep confirms that the order will be cancelled.  20 minutes later we get a call from a Technician who is booked in to cut off the Telstra services.  We tell him “no, the move order has been cancelled – leave everything the way it is”.  Phew, that was close.

2 hours later the line goes dead.  It’s all been cut off.

The remainder of the day is spend on cellphones getting shunted from call centre to office to services to technicians and finally at 5.01pm Friday we are told that the order had come from Telstra management to get the lines and port put back on.  It will only take as long as it takes to get a technician out to do the work.  Luckily we had a technician at the house putting in a second line.  He waves is magic fingers and everything is back to normal.  I tell the Telstra rep this and they say that everything else will be sorted at their end and sorry for the hassle.

I leave for the weekend.  On Monday – no internet.  I ring and get told I have it.  My modem says “no you don’t”. 2 Days later I finally get hold of someone who acknowledges that we in fact do not have broadband.  They explain that our port was reallocated to someone else and that we cannot get it back.  So much for the will of management.

What follows is 2 weeks of talking to Telstra and Telecom, neither want to sort it out and both of them pass the buck. The simple fact is that it takes a technicial a few minutes in the real world to hook this up.  But the we have to deal with the Telco’s and their policies, red tape, mindless automated systems and frontline staff with no power, all of which prevent a man in overalls walking up to a box and switching a port over.

Between Telecoms idiotic policies regarding port allocation, even if you are a business customer, and Telstras inability to take simple instructions and pass on information we lost our vital connection with the web.  A situation that could have put Martian under, during a recession no less.

Since these events we have heard of others who have suffered similar losses with no resolution or in many cases no explaination. The Telco’s need to step up and ensure they can offer the servises that they advertise AND make the public aware of the the possible problems when moving address rather than adopting a “too bad for you, not my problem” attitude.

Here are ome things you should know:

Insufficient Hardware
Telecom simply does not have enough actual, real-life hardware to give broadband to everyone that wants it.  It does not matter if your neighbour has broadband or if the Telecom site/rep says it’s available in your area – you will only get broadband if their is spare port available to add to your line at the junction.  How do you find out?  Well the Telecom reps at the help centre are not supposed to tell you but if you ring a few times you can sometimes get someone with a heart who can look into the lists for you – you just need the current phone number or address at the location.

Musical chairs
If your future location has a broadband port allocated to it it does not mean it will be available for you!  Since there are not enough ports to go around, any time an occupant moves the port used on the line to that location goes up for grabs.  Who ever is top of the Port Waiting List gets first dibs.  If you find out that the port will be reallocated talk to the currant occupant about taking over their account rather than them cutting it off.  Now this sounds dodgy but it is recommended by Telecom staff.

A robot stole my internet
At any time, if you broadband connection goes down, say due to technical error or people not following instructions, for any more than about 30mintes the system will assume your port is no longer in use and is free for re-allocation.  This means it will be offered to someone on the port waiting list.  Once your port is handed over it seems the policy is to “not piss off the broadband customer”, which leaves you, the loyal previous broadband customer without any service.

Hiding behind the Rules
I had to deal with both Telstra and Telecom.  They both use their procedures as an excuse for not being able to offer solutions when things go wrong.  No one seems interested in fixing a problem, even when they are the ones that caused it.  This is the reality of living with one company who owns all the lines and other companies that can use them as a scapegoat.  Everyone blames the “system” or the “software”.  When did a programme get given more power than the people who work it?  It this the Matrix?  Why can someone not pick up a phone and tell the people that need to know what is going on.  Why can they not tell “the system” that a port is not to be reallocated?  It’s madness.

Don’t deal with the automated answering service
Tired or pushing buttons and listening to the same options over and over again as you try to navigate your way through the answering system?  Just yell, yodel, squeal, blow rasberries or bark like a dog.  That’s right.  Confuse it twice and you ‘ll get put trhough to a human!

If you have had similar problems with the Telco’s then let us know.  We would be interested to see just how many people have been left stranded on the side of the internet highway.